The State of Affairs

The State of Affairs – Esther Perel
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Iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity Esther Perel returns with a provocative look at relationships through the lens of infidelity.

Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about the human heart—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations.

An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. Adultery has existed since marriage was invented, and so too the prohibition against it—in fact, it has a tenacity that marriage can only envy. So what are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book.

For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart.

Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

 

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Way of the Warrior Kid

Way of the Warrior Kid – Jocko Willink
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Fifth grade was the worst year of Marc’s life. He stunk at gym class, math was too hard for him, the school lunch was horrible, and his class field trip was ruined because he couldn’t swim. But what was most awful thing about fifth grade? Kenny Williamson, the class bully, who calls himself the “King of the Jungle.”

When Marc’s mother tells him that his Uncle Jake is coming to stay for the whole summer, Marc can’t wait. Uncle Jake is a for real, super-cool Navy SEAL. And Uncle Jake has a plan.

He’s going to turn Marc into a warrior.

Becoming a warrior isn’t easy. It means a lot of pull ups, sit ups, pushups, squats, swimming, eating right, and studying harder than ever before! Can Marc transform himself into a warrior before school starts in the fall – and finally stand up to the King of the Jungle himself?

 

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The Mama Natural

The Mama Natural – Genevieve Howland
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With over 60 million views on her YouTube channel, Howland’s (a.k.a. Mama Natural) funny but informational videos have empowered millions of women to embrace natural pregnancy and parenting. Now Howland is turning to the page, offering up the first week-by-week pregnancy & childbirth book from a natural perspective.

For the last half-century, control over childbirth has been in favor of doctors. Many pregnancy guidebooks are conventional, fear-based, or written by male physicians deeply entrenched in the medical model of birth.

But change is underway. A groundswell of women are taking back their pregnancy and childbirth and embracing a natural way. Genevieve Howland, the woman behind the enormously popular Mama Natural blog and YouTube channel, has created an inspiring, fun, and informative guide that demystifies natural pregnancy and walks mom through the process one week at a time.

The Mama Natural’s Week-by-Week Guide to Pregnancy and Childbirth is the modern (and yet ancient) approach to pregnancy and childbirth. “Natural” recognizes that pregnancy and birth are normal, and that having a baby is a wondrous biological process and rite of passage–not a medical condition. This book draws upon the latest research showing how beneficial and life-changing natural birth is for both babies and moms.

Full of weekly advice and tips for a healthy pregnancy, Howland details vital nutrition to take, natural remedies for common and troublesome symptoms, as well as the appropriate (and inappropriate) use of interventions.

Peppered throughout are positive birth and pregnancy stories from women of all backgrounds (and all stages of their natural journey) along with advice and insights from a Certified Nurse Midwife (CNM) plus a Registered Nurse (RN), doula, and lactation consultant. Encouraging, well-researched, and fun, The Mama Natural’s Week-by-Week Guide to Pregnancy and Childbirth will be an essential companion for women everywhere to embrace natural pregnancy and reap all the benefits for both baby and mama.

 

Disclaimer: This page contains affiliate links that may provide monetary compensation to help support the Whole Guidance Vision of Creating a Happy and Healthy Planet should you make a purchase. We very much appreciate and thank you for your support.

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The Four Agreements

The Four Agreements – Don Miguel Ruiz
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In The Four Agreements, bestselling author Don Miguel Ruiz reveals the source of self-limiting beliefs that rob us of joy and create needless suffering. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, The Four Agreements offer a powerful code of conduct that can rapidly transform our lives to a new experience of freedom, true happiness, and love.

  • A New York Times bestseller for over 8 years
  • Over 6 million copies sold in the U.S.
  • Translated into 40 languages worldwide

 

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Making Life Easy

Making Life Easy – Christiane Northrup MD
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You know Dr. Christiane Northrup as the best-selling author of books such as Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom and The Wisdom of Menopause—a beloved and trusted expert on everything that can go right with the female body. Now she brings her wisdom and insight to illuminate the mind, soul, and spirit as well.

In this joyfully encouraging new book—as useful for men as it is for women—Dr. Northrup explores the essential truth that has guided her ever since medical school: our bodies, minds, and souls are profoundly intertwined. Making life flow with ease, and truly feeling your best, is about far more than physical health; it’s also about having a healthy emotional life and a robust spiritual life. When you view your physical well-being in isolation, life can become a constant battle to make your body “behave.” When you acknowledge the deep connection between your beliefs and your biology and start to tune in to the Divine part of yourself, it’s a whole new ballgame—and the first step in truly making your life easy.

Take charge of your well-being as you learn to:

  • Untie the knots of blame and guilt that harm your health
  • Use sexual energy consciously to increase vitality
  • Balance your microbiome through healthy eating
  • Cultivate a healthy ego that serves you (not vice versa)
  • Communicate directly with the Divine
  • And much more

 
Drawing on fields from epigenetics to past-life regression to standard Western medicine, Dr. Northrup distills a brilliant career’s worth of wisdom into one comprehensive user’s guide to a healthy, happy, radiant life.

 

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Movement Matters

Movement Matters – Katy Bowman
(Buy from Amazon; Buy from The Book Depository)

What if we can make ourselves, our communities, and our planet healthier all at the same time by moving our bodies more?

Movement Matters
is a collection of essays in which biomechanist Katy Bowman continues her groundbreaking investigation of the mechanics of our sedentary culture and the profound potential of human movement. Here she widens her You are how you move message and invites us to consider our personal relationship with sedentarism, privilege, and nature. Bowman explores:* how convenience often means less movement, not more time

* the missing movement nutrients in our food

* how to include more nature in education

* the impact of adding movement to permaculture and ecological models

* our need for vitamin Community and group movement

Unapologetically direct, often hilarious, and always compassionate, Movement Matters demonstrates that human movement is powerful and important, and that living a movement-filled life is perhaps the most joyful and efficient way to transform your body, community, and world.

 

Disclaimer: This page contains affiliate links that may provide monetary compensation to help support the Whole Guidance Vision of Creating a Happy and Healthy Planet should you make a purchase. We very much appreciate and thank you for your support.

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The Complete Guide to Fasting

The Complete Guide to Fasting – Jason Fung MD, Jimmy Moore
(Buy from Amazon; Buy from The Book Depository)

Thousands of books have been written about the latest and greatest diets that will help people lose weight and improve health. But a key element in any successful nutritional health program is a tried-and-true method that most people haven’t thought about—yet it could be revolutionary for taking health to the next level. This ancient secret is fasting.

Fasting is not about starving oneself. When done right, it’s an incredibly effective therapeutic approach that produces amazing results regardless of diet plan. In fact, Toronto-based nephrologist Dr. Jason Fung has used a variety of fasting protocols with more than 1,000 patients, with fantastic success. In The Complete Guide to Fasting, he has teamed up with international bestselling author and veteran health podcaster Jimmy Moore to explain what fasting is really about, why it’s so important, and how to fast in a way that improves health. Together, they make fasting as a therapeutic approach both practical and easy to understand.

The Complete Guide to Fasting explains:

• why fasting is actually good for health
• who can benefit from fasting (and who won’t)
• the history of fasting
• the various ways to fast: intermittent, alternate-day, and extended fasting
• what to expect when starting to fast
• how to track progress while fasting
• the weight loss effects of fasting
• how to ward off potential negative effects from fasting

The book also provides tools to help readers get started and get through their fasts, including a 7-Day Kick-Start Fasting Plan and healing liquid recipes.

 

Disclaimer: This page contains affiliate links that may provide monetary compensation to help support the Whole Guidance Vision of Creating a Happy and Healthy Planet should you make a purchase. We very much appreciate and thank you for your support.

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WGP 052: Health is an Inside Job

Heal Thy Self

CLICK HERE TO DISCOVER THE BEST FOODS TO SUPPORT SELF-HEALING

This may sound revolutionary
But we must go back to our evolutionary history
To uncover human health mysteries
To discover the truth behind pain
To see the pleasure that can rain
Down upon your body treasure and turn sickness
Around back to health to feel full of abundance
And wealth to find amongst us true love
That shines bright like the sun above
Which moves the entire night into day
And from the dark comes this spiritual haze
It lifts and expands Its spiritual gaze
Toward you, by you, through you, and now from you

This Spirit you wonder is what’s wondering you
This soul you ponder is what’s pondering you
This energy you seek is what’s seeking you
This pain you bother is what’s bothering you
This pleasure you miss is what’s missing you
This life you live is what’s living you
And this love that you are is what is loving you

Don’t forget your ancestral past
Their power now lives within you, it will forever last
You are the product of generations of love
And your health will regenerate from this love

Health is not outside you, you are a health through and through
Health is your essence, do not forget this lesson

To find wealth there is no need to work
To find God there is no need for church
To find health there is no need to search
These are all expressions of love in the Universe

To be or not to be, love is always the answer
Life is rhythm so be a dancer
Sing in tune with Mother Nature
Follow her beat, you’ll find your centre
Play healing sounds and be a healer
Create beautiful music and become the Creator

Remember love is an inside job
Your heart is full of it and gives love as it throbs
But you cannot give what you do not understand
So learn what love is and make it your brand

Be open to giving your self a love raise
Be open to receiving loving gifts of praise

You get from life as much as you give
So give as much as you can afford to live
Now is not the time to be cheap
Love has no limit give it freely so others can keep
Giving what they’re getting to the rest of the world
This circle of giving and receiving is a never-ending whirl
Wind that blows through the entire cosmos
Everything, after all, is connected in the Universe

After you’ve given all that you got, you have not lost
There’s nothing to pay for love, there is no cost
In the end your health will be free
To express itself naturally

And one day you will realise and accept this truth
You are not in your body; your body is in you

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WGP 051: Your Life’s Love is Your Life’s Legacy

In this podcast I’ll be exploring Love and your Life’s Legacy:

  • I’ll explain how your legacy is a gift to the world that just keeps on giving
  • I’ll talk about how what you value and what you love determines the legacy you will leave behind
  • Finally, I’ll share a simple exercise that will help you create a life worth loving and a legacy worth leaving


CLICK HERE TO LEARN WHAT ARE THE BEST FOODS THAT WILL BRING MORE LOVE INTO YOUR LIFE

A legacy is something that is given from the past and received in the present and that will most definitely change the future.

There are many different types of legacies that you can leave behind after your passing. They may include tangible material things like a car, a house, money, a business, a cure, or even a child. Your legacy could also be abstract experiential things like an idea, a philosophy, a religion, a physical training program, or a procedure for dealing with grief.

Now your legacy, whether it is a person, a place, or a thing, whatever it is, it will always leave an impact in the world of the living for many years, long after you’ve moved on and it will change the world. The change may be small or large, but there’s still an impact. Even the smallest of events can lead to massive change, like a butterfly flapping its wing can contribute to the eventual formation of a hurricane, your legacy will have ripple effects on the world stage.

For instance, you and I are products of a lasting loving legacy known as humanity. Each generation of life is a legacy by default. Just by being born you have already impacted your parents, your caregivers, everyone who you’ve come into contact with throughout your lifetime, you have changed. So no matter how short or long your life or how small or big of an impact you have:

“You are legacy in full expression”

And you are leaving a legacy that will change the world, whether you’re fully aware of what that change is or not.

Now the type of legacy you leave behind will be determined by what you love and what you love about life comes from your personal core values.

Your personal core values are the needs you have when it comes to living an awesome life. They define how you want to live. They guide your choices and they determine the type of person you want to be. Core values also influence the types of personal relationships you want to be in and also what communities and organisations you wish to join.

If you value fast cars, big mansions, and money than those material objects will be what you want in your life and these are what you will leave as your legacy. If you value family, friendship, connection with others, than personal relationships and their affect on the people in your life will be the legacy that you will leave behind. If you value food, music, and wine a restaurant may be your legacy. A piece of music could be your legacy, or maybe a food, music, and wine festival, that could be your legacy.

Whatever you love you will pursue based on your values and after the game of life is over for you, those people, places, and things that you valued and have nothing but love for, will become your legacy.

There is one exercise I’d like to share that will help you determine your values, what you love about life, and ultimately your legacy. That exercise is writing your own obituary. Yes it may sound a bit of a morbid thing to do, but once you get into and finish your obituary you’ll be left with a sense of fulfilment and will find yourself really passionate about getting after life.

Really take the time, which could be hours, days, or weeks, to write your obituary and keep in mind these two things:

  1. How you would like to be remembered as a person? and
  2. What would you like to leave behind as a lasting loving legacy?


After the exercise look at what you’ve written down and you will figure out what your personal core values are.
If you wrote down he was a rich man who supported a lot of charities, then you know you value money and also generosity and that you love to give, and your legacy will be the many charities that you’ve helped. If you wrote down she was a nurturing mother who adopted and raised many abandoned and orphaned children, then you know you value family and giving children a second chance of having a loving family and home, and your legacy will be the next generation of adults who once felt alone, but now feel nothing but love.

Whatever you wrote down use it as a stepping stone to align the life you live with what you want your legacy to be.

There’s no right or wrong legacy. No matter what you value you will leave behind a legacy. The point I’m making here is that you’ll either be consciously aware of that legacy or completely ignorant to it.

I’ll leave you with you this thought.

Feeling loved or being loving isn’t really about sharing material things.

“Love is about sharing experiences with others.”

I am grateful for the lasting loving legacy my ancestors have given me and I will do my best to live a life full of unconditional love so that I leave a lasting loving legacy for those who one day I shall leave behind.

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WGP 050: What is Love?

In this podcast I’ll be exploring Love:

  • I’ll explain some of the ideas, the emotions, and actions of human love
  • I’ll talk about universal love and its absolute nature
  • Finally, I’ll give one loving practise you can use to transform any thought, word, or deed into an expression of love


CLICK HERE TO LEARN WHAT ARE THE BEST FOODS THAT WILL BRING MORE LOVE INTO YOUR LIFE

Love is a word with many many meanings. Thinking about love is not the same as feeling love and they are not the same as acting out of and being love.

The ideology behind love or the way most people think about love is that it is an emotion that creates a bond and a connection between two beings. The bond between a parent and its offspring, or the bond between a plant and the soil, and even the bond between the Sun and the Earth, these connections and relationships between different forms of life can be considered love.

The idea of human love usually brings up images of intimate romantic partnerships between two people. But there’s also family love, and friendly love, national love, and enemy love, fiery love, free love, violent love, and the love to complain and to hate things, and the love to give and to share, etc. There are many forms of human love. So thinking about love it isn’t just one thing, it’s many things.

Now just like the idea of love the emotion of love isn’t just one feeling. Love brings up many different emotions. Actually human love is a collection of hormones and neurotransmitters interacting together. The coordination of these molecules of energy in motion or molecules of emotion create different sensations in your bodymind that we call love such as:

  • Gratitude
  • Joy
  • Happiness
  • Peace
  • Serenity
  • Hope
  • Awe, and
  • Inspiration

 
For example, when I see a sunset I feel inspired and in awe of its beauty. It gives me hope for tomorrow, which gives me peace and serenity in the moment. I feel a sense of joy and happiness and I have nothing but gratitude for being alive and being able to experience such a fantastic event. Altogether I could simply say I loved witnessing the sun setting over the horizon. Again like the idea of love, feeling love isn’t just one thing, it’s many things.

When it comes to acting out of love and being love, again this ain’t one thing. Acts of love or loving deeds and being love are actually the culmination and the final expression of the way you think about love and the way you feel about love.

If you think love is being loyal to your nation and this inspires you to want to protect your country and the values it represents, your act of being love may lead you to sign up to the army and defend your country. If you think love is being listened to where people give you their undivided attention and you get filled with joy at being the focus of attention, then your act of being love will most likely make you quite the talker in your tribe where you seek a lot of the attention. And if you think love is all about food, something I know personally all too well, and eating makes you happy, then your loving deed will be to eat and the more love you seek, usually the more food you will eat.

So your thoughts about love, dictate how you feel love, and then ultimately how you express that love.

Now I’d like to move on from the human concept of love, where it can be many different things depending on your own unique view of the world, to the universal picture of love where love is absolutely everything.

This quote from the book The Voice of Knowledge by Don Miguel Ruiz perfectly summarises what I mean by universal love:

“The energy of love is just like the light that comes from the sun. Like sunlight, the emotion of love looks different depending on what is reflecting the love.”

This quote means that universal love is whatever it reflects. You see universal love is a form of energy that permeates everything, including you and me, and this energy reinforces and reveals the true nature and essence of the object that it’s infused with.

Universal love is the full experience. By that I mean it is all of the experiences one can experience in the universe even the negative experiences, such as fear, or neutral experiences such as the experience of no experience or emptiness and nothingness. So looking at it this way, love and fear are really two sides of the same coin, the yin and the yang of the same energy that I call universal love.

In this sense love is good and bad. Love is health and disease. Love is pleasure and pain. Love is laughter and sobbing. Love is for and against. Love is kindness and abuse. Love is peace and war. Love is order and chaos. Love is life and death. Love is the teacher and the student as well as the lesson and it can be all of these things because universal love is potential energy and it’s only when this potential energy fuses with a physical entity does love manifest and become what it needs to be depending on what it is a part of in that moment.

Human love again is many things dependant on your personal thoughts and feelings, whereas universal love is everything and shines a light on whatever it touches.

Now in the previous podcast I gave you three ways to accumulate more love for yourself:

  1. Understand how you give and receive love
  2. Practise being in an attitude of gratitude
  3. Build a loving tribe and community


The loving practise I’m going to give you now will help you reflect more love instead of fear and to transform any fear you perceive into love
and I hope you practise this as much as possible until it becomes second nature, a habit, a loving habit that becomes a part of your way of being. It really can change your life.

Whenever a person, or your environment, or anything, anything at all causes you to react and to think about fear, feel fear, or act in fear one of the best things you can do in that moment is to do nothing, absolutely nothing.

Just pause.

Stop everything, except for your breathing of course.

But do take a moment to sit with what’s coming up in your bodymind. The thoughts, the feelings, what you want to do. Now don’t stay too long in these thoughts and feelings of fear. Just take a few secs to a minute to wash yourself and wallow in this stew of fear.

Now focus on your breath and nothing else. Breathe through your nose and as you inhale focus on expanding your belly out in front of you, make yourself look full. As you exhale focus on shrinking your belly and bring it in, make yourself look empty. Focus on the flow of the air in and out of your nose and the movement of your diaphragm. Feel the air come in and out of your lungs. Feel your rib cage and core muscles expand and contract.

No matter how hard you concentrate on your breath and your body your mind will always want to wander and want to go back to that fear. Every time it does this, gently bring it back to your breath and your body by refocusing your attention here.

The idea behind this practise isn’t to forget about what just happened or to avoid fear entirely. The idea is to see the situation from a new perspective, from a perspective of love, shining a new light on it, hopefully changing how you see what just happened.

You don’t need to do this focused bodymind breathing for long. Just long enough where instead of feeling vulnerable and unsure about what’s going on and how you should react, you feel more empowered to come from a place of peace and love with a more holistic and grounded personal understanding of what just happened.

This mindfulness practise of learning to respond from love instead of react from fear, if you can practise this daily, multiple times a day as is necessary, over time you will begin to see things and life in an entirely new way where loving options that were once hidden from your view suddenly appear out of nowhere.

As inspirational speaker and author Wayne Dyer used to say:

“Everything in the Universe came from nowhere, now here.”

And Wayne Dyer also said:

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

So if you can see fear as another form of love you will be more present to the love that has always been there, surrounding you this entire time.

I’ll leave you with this thought.

You won’t always give love to others as they want it and you won’t always receive love as you want it, and universal love doesn’t always give you what you want, but universal love will always, and I mean always, give you what you need in that moment.

In my Universe and how I see life, love is the circle of life, the beginning and end of all things. It is the alpha and the omega of everything that exists.

“Love is creation.”

Love is the process of creation. It is the creative process and this process is eternal, it never ends and it’s constantly changing and in flow. This creative process begins with the receiving of love from another, which is received as a thought. This thought is then transformed into a feeling, and this feeling manifests itself in reality as a physical act of love being given from within to without, from you to another.

So in essence to me love is the transformation of itself between itself from itself to itself. To put it another way:

“Love is love experiencing love.”

And all there is, is love.

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